Our Man in Vienna

Shooting Up the Place

 

The Don’s’ moniker for Corona is “Kung Flu,”
and he repatedly refers to the “China Virus.”

Who would deny that the birthplace
of this scourge is the “People’s Republic?”

So, if you are stuck with “a sex addiction,”
and are “deeply religious” to boot,
and are having “a bad day,”
and there’s an assault weapon at your disposal,
why head for a massage parlor and shoot up the place?

And if you’re just mad at the world,
any location will do.

 

Spokesman for the Weapons Lobby

There have been massacres in schools,
college campuses, shopping malls, movie theaters, churches
and even in an army fort.

People must be able to protect themselves.
The only answer is arms.

Now, you are right to assert that a pistol is no match
for a man in body armor who totes an assault weapon.

What’s the answer? As Spokesman for the” Weapons” Lobby,
I say that there has to be a security guard armed with a bazooka
at every outdoor and indoor public place.

 

– Herbert Kuhner